“What’s the quickest way to become a millionaire? Borrow fivers off everyone you meet.” ~Richard Branson
Here’s Richard Branson at age 27 on a boat on the Thames for the launch of the Sex Pistol’s God Save The Queen. The police chased the boat, people were arrested, and everyone had a jolly good time.
I once conducted a thought experiment to see if I could imagine hooking up with a celebrity. This is a pastime I never quite got into. I don’t look at pictures of strangers from TV and think, gee, I sure would like to kiss that guy. Just thinking about it now, I get that old familiar feeling of revulsion. On some fundamental level, I don’t really even get the impulse. I explained why early in my blogging life in a post titled If You Knew Branson Like I Knew Branson.
Practically everyone I know has a celebrity crush, so I began to wonder what my malfunction was. I like to use my imagination. I like people. I’m not a prude. So, I tried to think of celebrities as objects of desire rather than entertainers and dancing monkeys.
It took a long time, but I finally made up my mind that Richard Branson was the only possible choice. It helped that I once had a dream that I was married to him, and I was really happy. But that’s besides the point…no, wait, maybe I didn’t even do the task properly. My imagination stole from my dream. My waking self is a rotten thief.
Ok, I know what you’re saying…Branson’s not really a celebrity, or it’s because he’s rich, or ew, that guy’s 20 years older than you. But, I refute all of these statements (except for the 20 years my senior one, that’s true). First off, he’s celebrity enough. Secondly, I’m not that shallow to pick someone for their money. If that were the case, I’d have it bad for Bill Gates or Warren Buffet or Carlos Slim Helu.
But what I’ve realized about my journey to Sir Richard is that I only chose him because I want to be like him. He’s the only famous person whose life I envy. He seems happy and fulfilled and fun. Not the kind of fun only money can buy, but truly fun. Someone who’s up for an adventure. Who’s not afraid to take a risk. Who treats waitstaff well. Who will fly a hot air balloon around the world but will also kick it on the couch and watch a DVD or read a book or talk about ideas. So, really, I ended up picking who I’d like to be if I couldn’t be me. But, whatever. I did the assignment!
I didn’t know then that my fantasy relationship with Branson would fester and return. He was profiled in The New Yorker last month and by chance someone mentioned it to me. I don’t get The NYer, so I haven’t read it yet. But I’m getting it. A copy of the article is on its way! And when I do, I’ll be sure to share some of the best stories about him. Stay tuned. Oh, and when you get a chance, can you send me 5 bucks?
spanky said,
June 19, 2007 at 10:39 am
that is amazing. the z to the z thing. i must be psychic, or psychotic…either way its exciting. this must mean something. julie get a hootie cleavage shirt, and we will set off to find this richard dude.
julieluongo said,
June 19, 2007 at 10:46 am
See, when you put it that way, I know I didn’t do the assignment right. I don’t really want to meet Richard Branson. What would I say to him? Maybe, “Can I borrow five bucks?”
kc said,
June 19, 2007 at 10:46 am
yes, but do you look at pictures of celebrities and think “I would like to kiss her?…
My celebrity crushes are:
Drew Barrymoore;
Maggie Gyllenhaal;
Justin Timberlake; and
Ryan Phillipe. (shut up, Gary)
you are fond of the beards, aren’t you. gross.
julieluongo said,
June 19, 2007 at 10:54 am
I want to hold Patricia Arquette’s hand in Flirting with Disaster. She’s just so sweet and supportive and exhausted. I might be more apt to think of kissing actresses. Maggie Gyllenhaal was appealing in Stranger than Fiction. I’ll give it some thought.
spanky said,
June 19, 2007 at 11:10 am
well. i think i could add a certain flare to a meeting. im sorry i failed my reading assignment. (insert shame) but i was thinking…wut with my blurb on xz or whatever…oh hell lets just go see who we can see.
i like boys that look dirty
paul walker
scott spedman ( i think that is his name)
i cant think of anyone else. I like to look at liv tyler and other pretty girls. I am forever annoyed with the squenched up face renee Z makes.
Pegster said,
June 19, 2007 at 11:13 am
OMG – This is very weird – but James Taylor – for ever and ever I have been in love with this ex-heroin addict/incredibly talented man. He continues to improve himself, learning French, taking cello lessons (from YoYo Ma). He is not so much older and I am sure that we would have plenty in common because we are born 10 days apart and thus astrological buddies.
I would just like to sit and listen to him speak and sing to me. If I kissed him, it would be the cheek kiss. I would like to touch his fingers and rub his hands. And I would like to cook him a nice pasta dish.
julieluongo said,
June 19, 2007 at 11:15 am
Xzibit! Word. He’ll pimp your ride.
julieluongo said,
June 19, 2007 at 11:18 am
Peg! Good call on James. I love him. In fact, I had an album cover of him hanging in my college dorm room … in the 90s? Yeah, that’s how cool I am. But, that October Road LP he put out after he got married, what dreck. He needs some angst with his art.
Jim said,
June 19, 2007 at 11:27 am
Oh, James Taylor is great. Have you seen his new box set, “Songs to Bleed Out in the Bath Water To.”
Simply, fabulous.
Pegster said,
June 19, 2007 at 11:41 am
Freedy Johnston covered that box set, Jim – It’s really powerful.
Pegster said,
June 19, 2007 at 11:42 am
Now, I’m off to read the obituaries…
julieluongo said,
June 19, 2007 at 11:42 am
Yeah, I know. Same with Steely Dan. People who like them will defend them by citing their talent and edgy subject matter. But non fans just hear the melodic tones and say, “cheesy 70s.” I can’t argue. I want to scream when I hear Fire and Rain. But, I Was Only Telling a Lie? It’s good, funked-up music.
spanky said,
June 19, 2007 at 11:57 am
Oh, James Taylor is great. Have you seen his new box set, “Songs to Bleed Out in the Bath Water To.”
Simply, fabulous.
you just slid that right in there didnt you
Christy said,
June 19, 2007 at 12:31 pm
Dragon Story.
Michael used to be one of my roommates (1994/5ish?) – he helped me to learn an easy lesson in a hard way.. Never -EVER- open a bedroom door without first knocking and then waiting for a verbal confirmation that you may enter (unless of course you are trying to snap compromising photos…)
I knocked on his door and opened it without waiting – this is what I saw:
Walls plastered with posters of Bosch paintings. (My boyfriend at the time worked at a poster warehouse so I imagine this was cheap – if not free – for him to do.)
His bed was covered in our bent non-matching silverware, crusty gravy boats, change jar contents (primarily quarters mixed with little army men, 50 cent toys from the vending machine at Shoprite and a few errant screws). He was sitting on top of this mess buck fucking naked craning his neck upward making – what I can only assume was – his approximation of the noises a dragon makes when it is breathing fire. It was awful, his arms were hugging the “treasures” and there were pennies and bits of paper trash (like wadded gum wrappers) stuck to his legs and feet. His white pasty fucking ass was slightly raised – and yes – there were nickels and dimes stuck to that shit too.
I have NEVER been able to eradicate this image from my mind. It was truly horrifying – I don’t think there are words to convey how terrible it was. I guess though, thinking on it – it’s a pretty harmless little game – at least he’s not making sweet rump love to Rwandan child sex slaves anymore.
spanky said,
June 19, 2007 at 12:38 pm
OH MY GOD…THAT WAS WELL WORTH THE WAIT.
that is the funniest story ever. EVER.
spanky said,
June 19, 2007 at 12:38 pm
WAS HE PLAYING DRAGON LORD OF THE SILVERWARE?
Christy said,
June 19, 2007 at 12:44 pm
He never really explained himself – it’s unlikely that you’ll get an answer from him on this either because he’s constructed a reality for himself where this never happened.
spanky said,
June 19, 2007 at 12:49 pm
it does not matter. infact even if you made this up, the hilarity remains. fucking heeelarious.
for mikes sake I am hoping there was some acid involved, otherwise….well lets not think about otherwise.
so he had not a stitch of clothing on?
Christy said,
June 19, 2007 at 1:08 pm
No clothing at all… He could have had a sock on his dick or something – he was lying cockside down – but I doubt it. I think he wanted to feel booty over every inch of his bod.
spanky said,
June 19, 2007 at 1:10 pm
I cannot stop laughing. can.not.stop. lord. he better have been high. thats all im saying
Christy said,
June 19, 2007 at 1:14 pm
I don’t think he was.. He had acute dragon fetish at the time.. For example – he went FOREVER without lady action – then finally he had a date – he takes her to a dragon movie. Now – if that’s your nerd thing fine – but your run of the mill girl is a little iffy about indulging nerd fetish – it was a risky move. If I didn’t know him – I might have thought it ballsy.
spanky said,
June 19, 2007 at 1:20 pm
i JUST REALIZED THAT HE WAS PLAYING THE dragon in the book the hobbit, because as i recall (and sissy agrees…I am talking to her on the phone right now) that this is hobbit related. in the end the dragon was slayed. i think.
reading this story to her over the phone made me laugh harder and now i have a sore throat because i have choked on my own spit.
spanky said,
June 19, 2007 at 1:20 pm
the dragon in the hobbit loved his prizes…
Gary said,
June 19, 2007 at 1:22 pm
Ryan Phillipe. (shut up, Gary)
I don’t know what I’m supposed to shut up about ???
I’ve always liked Winona Ryder – since I saw Beetlejuice. Now she seems more than a bit nutty. I always like the nutty ones too. She’s still really pretty too. I like the short dark haired look, but it’s not required.
I’d like to be more like Frank Zappa, but I’m far too lazy and don’t really have the cajones.
spanky said,
June 19, 2007 at 1:27 pm
You just read the story of the century and you can only discuss hot celeb’s? gary you just lost some points.
Gary said,
June 19, 2007 at 1:28 pm
um… it didn’t really do anything for me. Maybe next time.
spanky said,
June 19, 2007 at 1:33 pm
Oh. well. this should not shock me i guess.
Heather said,
June 19, 2007 at 1:41 pm
Yeah. That sounds like Mike. If that’s true, I have to say it’s still not as disturbing as what I was going with under the heading “Dragon Story”. Mine was more along the lines of “Riding the Snake” a la Jim Morrison or Jim Carrey doing that speed freak “Tame the Tiger” guy on SNL. But they’re all funny.
Gary said,
June 19, 2007 at 1:45 pm
I hate James Taylor but love Steely Dan. Their music, that is.
spanky said,
June 19, 2007 at 1:49 pm
“Riding the Snake”
ha ha ha
Heather said,
June 19, 2007 at 2:03 pm
Now if Julie could provide us with stories like these, we’d pony up the five dolla all the livelong day. We need the kind of entertainment that only abject humiliation can provide apparently. It’s fun for the whole family! In fact, my son just heard this story and he’s laughing his sick little head off.
“Tell me the part again, Mama, with the army men?”
“Oh, alright, John Boy. But then you have to go to sleep.”
Heather said,
June 19, 2007 at 2:08 pm
The fact that Christy is still his friend says a lot. What, exactly, I cannot say, but it’s probably touching.
spanky said,
June 19, 2007 at 2:12 pm
I think that incident has made Christy the fine lady she is today. answers many questions for me. seeing poor forelorn army men stuck to a dragon behind can change ya for life
Christy said,
June 19, 2007 at 2:24 pm
I put the dragon story behind me. I choose to remember things like when Michael came back from Germany because we got him tickets to a live KITH show. I drove him down to Floods so he could catch up with his friends – and we stayed out a bit too long – this really put Scott (my ex) out of sorts – because we didn’t return right away. Scott was so pissy about it – that he did that thing that passive aggressive chicks do – he went to bed early. Michael and I pulled out the bed couch, got our jammies on, loaded the VCR with the KITH tapes that he’d painstakingly made (over 6hrs each) and did some bong hits. I don’t think either one of us was into pot anymore then – but it was a reminiscing thing… Anyway – Scott HATED (and still does I believe) farts. Part of his annoyance with the bond Michael and I had was that Michael would do things like say – “Hey Christy!”, I’d say, “What?” – he’d then crack an earth shattering fart and I’d fall on the floor laughing – because I can never not laugh audibly when I hear fart. Scott would yell at Michael for farting and then reprimand me for encouraging him! So – back to that night – for hours Michael was cracking HUGE FARTS while we were watching KITH and I was laughing myself to tears – finally we heard Scott from the bedroom, “You guys, stop it – it’s not funny..” – which of course made us laugh harder (the hushed hissy laugh when you don’t want your parents to hear you kind of laugh).. Ahhh.. Good times.
Once Michael farted so big I felt it through the floor in the kitchen (he was in the living room). That was a bad day for Scott.
Heather said,
June 19, 2007 at 2:29 pm
See? Touching.
spanky said,
June 19, 2007 at 2:30 pm
(the hushed hissy laugh when you don’t want your parents to hear you kind of laugh).. Ahhh.. Good times.
i do alot of hushed hissy laughs at work when i read fart stories. i dont really get much else done
Heather said,
June 19, 2007 at 2:37 pm
I think the dragon story might be made better with the addition of pink, ill-fitting panties.
spanky said,
June 19, 2007 at 2:39 pm
or maybe a pink, ill fitting sock..babhahahahahahahah
Christy said,
June 19, 2007 at 2:41 pm
Well he wasn’t wearing those things – I’m not gonna humiliate the guy by making up blatant falsehoods.
Heather said,
June 19, 2007 at 2:42 pm
Well, let it be said that we’ve all got “dragon stories” and most of us are fortunate that they’ll never see the light of the, um, internet. “Dragon story” is one hell of a metaphor, in fact. And Mike is a good sport. Also, someone should get Christy some Witness Protection pretty soon because he will be trying to kill her in her sleep. By farting.
spanky said,
June 19, 2007 at 2:44 pm
it isnt a humiliation. I dont feel any shame for michael. he clearly had a passion for the dragon thing and thats cool with me. Your description of it remains onee of the best told stories ever. i can see the whole thing unfold in my mind even as i type this.
personally…if it was me, i would have sprung for some fake pirate coin so i looked all shimmery and stuff. coin jar contents is not really dragon worthy.
spanky said,
June 19, 2007 at 2:46 pm
I rubbed a today sponge on my face for god sake. I will never shun dragon boy. i also married a main who has a poop stick and a lima bean in his penis. so comon, we are all friends here
Heather said,
June 19, 2007 at 2:49 pm
It is singularly the best story ever told. But “yes” to springing for doubloons.
Christy said,
June 19, 2007 at 2:52 pm
Sadly – I think Michael endured ass trauma in Iraq. He just doesn’t fart the same anymore – he almost looks embarrassed sometimes.
spanky said,
June 19, 2007 at 2:54 pm
Dood. that is saddening.
I once suffered from lack of farts. i just didnt have any. siisy had TONS OF GAS. but none for me. for a long time people beleived i simply had never farted. All that changed once i had kids. im like the kid who can burp on que. I am the super farter. I enjoy let em rip on the kids.
mine sound like those firecrackers that kinda scream/schreech….very popular at parties.
Christy said,
June 19, 2007 at 2:58 pm
He still has farts – he tries to not make such a big production now – or worse, conceal them entirely. Every once in a while he throws a bone and runs through the routine – but I feel like his heart really isn’t in it anymore.
Heather said,
June 19, 2007 at 3:00 pm
It’s called PTAD. There’s really no treatment. It just takes time, patience and a lot of bean dip.
spanky said,
June 19, 2007 at 3:14 pm
God…what a heartbreak to have to watch. give him some carrots…they are always good ammo for me
Christy said,
June 19, 2007 at 3:25 pm
I just got a ridiculous visual – me leaning into Michael’s apartment – not fully entering – patting him gently on the head and forcing carrots into his face, “Here boy – good – you like those!”
Heather said,
June 19, 2007 at 3:47 pm
Like Lady Godiva! I think I remember this poster. I didn’t know Bosch had such deleterious effects, but now I can say, “Hey, Heather, there’s still a thin layer of gabardine between you and de ‘dragon times.’” I’m also saying that if that was around the time I knew Mike, there was probably a good explanation. If I remember 1994 AT ALL – and I’m not saying I do – but I think everyone I knew was in a near-constant state of wasted in one way or another. Weren’t we all? Or was it just me? Because I’m thinking I could round up worse stories somewhere. They may or may not have involved midgets.
Christy said,
June 19, 2007 at 3:53 pm
I didn’t encounter midgets until I lived in New Orleans.
Heather said,
June 19, 2007 at 3:54 pm
Sometimes it surprises me that I’ve got enough of a mind left to form sentences and things. “Lookit me! I can name the pretty colors!”
Heather said,
June 19, 2007 at 4:00 pm
I’d like to hear a nice New Orleans midget tale. Especially if it involves any of the following: gumbo, voodoo, or beads.
Heather said,
June 19, 2007 at 4:01 pm
“Laissez Les Bons Midgets Rouler!”
Heather said,
June 19, 2007 at 4:17 pm
I loved that town. When I lived in Pensacola, it was a three-hour drive to New Orleans, so we’d take road trips sometimes. Anyone who actually lived there has weirder stories than I, for sure. But I saw the craziest shows there, stayed at the craziest places. I haven’t been since probably ‘99. That place was like no other.
Jim said,
June 19, 2007 at 4:32 pm
“Rikki Don’t Lose That Numba, it’s the only one you own…”
Raooor … Raoooooro, schhht schhhht. Raaaaaoooorr!
“You might use it if you feel betta…”
Screeeeech screeeee raaaoorr scrreeeeeeeee!
Michael the last man dragon or Steely Dan…
Guess which one I’d rather listen to.
Heather said,
June 19, 2007 at 5:34 pm
The Last Mandragon!
Heather said,
June 19, 2007 at 5:35 pm
It’s like a mandrake, but differenter!
michael said,
June 19, 2007 at 6:17 pm
I fart in everybody’s general direction. Hmmph.
Christy, I am so gonna dirty sanchez your ass tonight.
Heather said,
June 19, 2007 at 7:54 pm
Hee hee hoo hoo. Seriously? This was a great story. Maybe greater if one isn’t reading it about oneself, but still. Great. Because we really could have thought much, much awfuller things. The thing is: everyone has a funky story somewhere. (OK. I might have seven.) But our funky stories are what bind us all together in our… uh… in our funkiness. Hooray!
Jim said,
June 19, 2007 at 8:09 pm
Ok, ok, ok… You guys, seriously.
I just found my purpose in life… Listen to this:
I shall find the one singular word and or act that commits blasphemy against all, and I mean, ALL of the worlds religions simultaneously!
Fuck Yeah!
Heather said,
June 19, 2007 at 8:22 pm
Is it “Mandragon”?
Heather said,
June 19, 2007 at 8:23 pm
You can use it. I forfeit all royalties.
Heather said,
June 19, 2007 at 8:43 pm
Of course, I’d prefer if you used a special character, like dees: “mandragón.” Arriba!
Heather said,
June 19, 2007 at 8:54 pm
Oooh, no. “Assa-clam-aleikum.”
Sissy said,
June 19, 2007 at 11:00 pm
Dragon Story by Christy.
This is perfectly explanable as an obvious cross character study of Jame Gumb (Silence of the Lambs) and Golum (LOTR).
“It rubs the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again….Precious….my precious…..Now it places the lotion in the basket…..Wicked, tricksey, false…It places the lotion in the basket….Precious is wanting to go back to him. But we mustn’t let him have it….Put the fucking lotion in the basket!”
Sissy said,
June 19, 2007 at 11:02 pm
No, no. I was just kidding there. I know Michael was having sex with his things while his dragons watched. You all act like you’ve never had sex with the items in your junk drawer while dragons sat around and took in the show. Who doesn’t?
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 7:10 am
Rikki Don’t Lose That Numba, it’s the only one you own…”
Raooor … Raoooooro, schhht schhhht. Raaaaaoooorr!
“You might use it if you feel betta…”
Screeeeech screeeee raaaoorr scrreeeeeeeee!
Michael the last man dragon or Steely Dan…
Guess which one I’d rather listen to.
Oh god jim…just when i am sure you have outdoen yourself…
and christy….feeding carrots thru the window is the only option…otherwise he will catch on, and realize what you are doing
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 7:12 am
yeah….i like for my stuffed animals to watch. my snoopy dog collection too
capricorn1966 said,
June 20, 2007 at 7:22 am
The items in my junk drawer certainly wouldn’t give me the same pleasure as the items under my bed.
I love dragons, I was born in the third decanate, under my sign, Capricorn. My constellation is Draco the Dragon, “the seeing one” who guarded the Golden Apples.
capricorn1966 said,
June 20, 2007 at 7:26 am
And no, I wasn’t there guarding Michaels apples, and for that matter, Keyser’s either. He’s on his own on that one. Although sissy, I use to ask Claire if her dad was picking her up today. Just to get a glance.
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 7:49 am
wait. you used to “glance” at andy’s apples.
i feel after school special now.
capricorn1966 said,
June 20, 2007 at 8:06 am
no not his apples..just him, i think he is very attractive, ok, ok, he’s hot.
There is only a handfull of parents I can say that about and he was one of them. here’s how it went down.
“Claire who’s picking you up today”
“mommy”
“Are you sure it’s not “DADDY’
“no, mommy is”
OK, when’s daddy going to pick you up?”
“I don’t know”
12:00pm…Saranne, I keep asking claire when is her daddy picking her up, Your husband is very cute, you know.
“yeah that’s what they all say.
and now I have to bow my head as a teacher and listen to all this stuff about poop praying and ball sacs.
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 8:21 am
Speaking of which….when i was about twenty one, I was out and about with sissy and keyser…jet skiing, having loads of fun….went back to their home to get showers and get some dinner. was in their master bathroom, looking for a washcloth, and as i was leaving the bathroom, walking into the bedroom, i came upon a naked frontal of keyser.
much screaming on my part ensued. I think keyser was embarassed for a minute and then he laughed. I was scarred for life.
so while you think he is cute and hot cappy…i have actually seen the apples…and like the dragon incident…the image cannot be erased.
capricorn1966 said,
June 20, 2007 at 8:29 am
well I don’t plan on seeing any apples, and I think a glance from afar distance will be just fine right about now. I don’t think I have to worry about teaching anymore of his kids and with sissy not working with me I probably won’t come in contact with him anytime soon. and with all of these words he probably knows who capricorn is, how embarrassing, (that’s right keyser it’s jean, hahhahhhahahahah)
capricorn1966 said,
June 20, 2007 at 8:35 am
oh commenting on the post. I am turned on by alot of famous people, that’s just me. There’s alot but the most sexiest one that I’ve had a fantasy crush on ever since he played in “21 jump street” is Johny Depp. I would definitely take the things out of my junk drawer and play with him.
And this is not me at all by nature, but I think the geek doctor on crimimal minds is very sexy. I don’t know what it is about him, i think the way he talks, i don’t know but he turns me on.
Pegster said,
June 20, 2007 at 8:39 am
Early morning confession! That’s what I like about this corner of the Internets
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 8:42 am
Ill say!!
thats what I like to hear.
im turned on mainly by herpes commercials.
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 8:43 am
im kidding.
and cappy, id take johnny depp too…he is mysterious. and hot. and funny. yep he is a good one
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 8:55 am
Valtrex gets me hot. I mix it in with my methadone and MMMM MMMMM! “How you like my boddddy now?”
Regarding the Sighting of the Golden Apples, what I feel compelled to know is: Was there shrinkage?
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 8:57 am
I guess it probably goes without saying that the celebrity I am most turned on by is Howard K. Stern. Delicious!
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 9:02 am
(Not really. After a Depp/Timberfinkle sammich, I personally go with the Steve Carrell/Stephen Colbert/Jon Stewart daisy chain. I can’t say it’s right. Just that it works.)
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 9:04 am
i loooove john stewart. mainly because he is married. hahah kidding,
um i dont think there was shrinkage. as keyser would say, “it was like a baby arm holding an apple” eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 9:06 am
“Yeah, Colbert, you’d BETTER know a district!” I shout as he slowly unbutto… Wait. What? Where am I?
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 9:09 am
A baby arm holding an apple = Priceless.
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 9:13 am
thanks keyser…its his image
Sissy said,
June 20, 2007 at 9:20 am
“I was born in the third decanate, under my sign, Capricorn. My constellation is Draco the Dragon, “the seeing one” who guarded the Golden Apples.”
Cap, stop. You’re turning Michael on.
P.S. Hazel broke her foot again.
Sissy said,
June 20, 2007 at 9:21 am
OH! Cap, you are bad!!!!!!! LOLOLOLOL!
I’m just happy that Rory and Hazel are in the same class next year. wink, wink.
Sissy said,
June 20, 2007 at 9:23 am
“I probably won’t come in contact with him anytime soon.”
I’m sending him to your house today. Just gave him the address. He’ll be there around five.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 9:25 am
I just heard the porno bass line in my head. “Baw chicka baw baw.” Tell Andy to wear a pizza delivery outfit.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 9:28 am
Broken feet are the stupidest!
Sissy said,
June 20, 2007 at 9:28 am
I was obsessed with Matt Damon forever. But then he had a kid. Slut.
Then came J. Depp, until Friday when I saw POTC and witnessed J.D. without a shirt. EWWWWW. I’m a muscle girl. I need definition, damnit. I need some color. That’s what cool about Keyser, with his Native American lineage, he is always a lighter shade of expresso.
So, my fantasy of J.D. bringing his kid to the book signing of my first chapter book for children has disintigrated into,
“Hey, Mr. Depp. Too bad I couldn’t belt this thread out BEFORE the release of number three. Jeeesh. Move along. Next!”
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 9:37 am
I’m just wondering whose boy-junk will be up next. Hmm. Let’s think.
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 9:39 am
capps kids is named Rory? I am in love. love that name. good girl cappy.
and forget the cast sara…just get a tube sock a ruler and some eletrical tape and we will be good to go
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 9:41 am
I want to see Jim’s boy junk…..who will join me in this Cheer??
I love Ganitor junk mmm mm good
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 9:41 am
Janitor Junk! Janitor Junk! Bring out the Janitor Junk!
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 9:41 am
it looks like i called him “jim boy” which for some reason really made me laugh.
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 9:42 am
it was the “hisssy so my boss wont hear me not working” laugh
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 9:46 am
See now, this has the potential to turn into an estrogen fest. And I fear the wrath of… wait. No, I don’t. Janitor Junk! Janitor Junk!
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 9:46 am
Janitor Junk! Janitor Junk!
Janitor Jim’s got junk in the trunk!
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 9:48 am
i think he must be cleaning the girls locker room or something. maybe he will stop by later for an inappropriate comment. more than knowing who keyser is/was…id sure like to know more about jim boy. he makes some bold comments, but he never actually talks to anyone. could he be a bot? like a super funny awesome bot?
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 9:48 am
Wait. I don’t even know what that means. But now it sounds wrong.
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 9:50 am
Me? Wrong? maybe. but that is the special blend of spanky.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 9:51 am
No. Junk in his trunk sounded wrong after I said it. Ha ha ha. I got a little carried away.
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 9:52 am
junk in trunk, i think, means big hinee. and i dont want a fat butt man. now i am envisioning a tall skinny janito with a badonk a donk ass and i am not liking it at all
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 9:52 am
I just knew it rhymed, so I went with it.
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 9:53 am
“janito” is the new slang term for custodian.
example…”yo Janito…come clean my waste muthah fuckah”
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 9:54 am
I know. Of course, the next place my crazy mind goes to is “junk” = “man-bits”, “trunk” = “ass”, and then I felt like I should put a disclaimer there. Honestly, I was really only going for the rhyme, not trying to impute some man-bits to Jim’s ass that he may or may not be into. No chaps of shame for that beaver!
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 9:56 am
Beaver = Badger. Looks like Freud is slipping all over the place this morning. Awesome.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 9:58 am
“Janitor, clean-up on Aisle Three. Dr. Freud is about to break a hip.”
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 9:59 am
THIS WEEK ON LIFETIME ORIGIONAL MOVIES FOR PATHETIC WOMEN WITH NO LIFE WHATSOEVER PRESENTS
“THE JANITO…he beat all the odds and finailly used tuff love to get the kids to flush AND wash their hands.”
see his story tonight at 8pm
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 9:59 am
I need some therapy me thinks.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 10:02 am
NO WAY, NO HOW. This is my therapy. Worth every penny.
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 10:03 am
THIS COMMENT ID FROM SIISY TO PEG….I AM JUST THE JANITO
“peg…in regards to your early morning confession, you would know peg, you are the ultimate confessor”
i dont know what that means. i asked her to repeat it three times. peg i hope you get her meaning
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 10:06 am
I should find another thread to bounce around in. I’m full of coffee. Aiee!
Christy said,
June 20, 2007 at 10:07 am
Michael thought he was going to d sanchez me – well he had another thing coming…
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 10:21 am
Frick. i cant see the link christy. can someone look at it and then report to me about what it says/
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 10:22 am
I’m working on it. My modem just wigged out.
Pegster said,
June 20, 2007 at 10:22 am
Totally get it.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 10:23 am
I can’t actually tell, but it appears to have been taken with some sort of night-vision goggles.
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 10:23 am
glad you do. BECAUSE IF YOU TOD HER THE PRIEST STORY AND DIDNT TELL ME IM GONNA BE SUPER TORKED.
sounds like some shifty business if ya ask me
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 10:24 am
With like, a piece of cheese on a finger under his nose…? I’m not a magician!
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 10:24 am
aw comon…..christy ttok night google movie of mike in his yard during a ’squirril ceremoney”
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 10:25 am
humph. im always the tag along, always left out. mike put cheese in his nose and i missed it
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 10:30 am
It’s the sancheziest. But super-hard to make out.
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 10:35 am
i say it is a “smell my finger” ploy
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 10:39 am
I swear to God, it looks like there’s a piece of cheese sitting on her hand from here. What is that? How old and blind am I?
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 10:41 am
A) I like that it’s named Mike Sanchez.
B) It’s probably good it’s not more defined. Mike’s got enough worries now with his after-school special life all over these internets. No need to add a Sanchez into the mix. And yet, Christy manages to do it. Love her.
capricorn1966 said,
June 20, 2007 at 10:51 am
sissy, give Hazel a big kiss for me, I’m so sorry for her, how the hell did she do that. I told you she was just like you.
five is not a good time. my husband will be there.
I told you I love astrology. I’m glad I’m turning someone on these days.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 10:54 am
Cappy: Me = Leo, Moon/Venus in Virgo, Asc/Mercury in Cancer, Mars in Aries. And uh, all the rest very boring to no one but you, maybe me. When I was born, my aunt drew up my birth chart by hand. She’s gone, but I still have it.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 10:58 am
“Boring to no one but you, maybe me” meant that I’d share more if I was sure it wouldn’t be annoying to anyone else. I’d go on all day.
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 10:59 am
thats awesome. what a cool thing to have kept!!
draw mine draw mine!!!
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 11:00 am
im not bored and i dont hear anyone else chirping so go for it. after that ill wrap the morning with a little “poison ivy in the eye” story from my childhood.
capricorn1966 said,
June 20, 2007 at 11:01 am
i wish i could do my birth chart, but i have one missing link. the exact time i was born. My mom doesn’t remember. I feel incomplete.
my moon is scorpio. one of the more difficult lunar signs.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 11:04 am
Spank: I can, but nowadays, you can get a computerized chart for free online. There’s a good place called AstroDienst, if I recall, that’ll give you a good summary, too. I used to use a really good book, too, that’s probably out of print called “Secrets from A Stargazer’s Notebook.” Best-written astrology book, bar none. Funny.
Cap: Nice. You can use noon to approximate. The only thing it will really affect is maybe the rising sign because that changes every two hours. But otherwise, all the rest will be exactly the same if you use noon instead of an exact time.
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 11:08 am
i was born at 1pm. i think
my kids were born at 6.42 and 6.49 respectivly
capricorn1966 said,
June 20, 2007 at 11:09 am
Leo’s love to be in the spot light, life of the party and have the last say. I can tell by just this blog. Don’t get me wrong I’m not putting you down, but I can see that sometimes you take over or make the last comment. I didn’t want this to come out the wrong way. You’re smart you know what I’m trying to say.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 11:09 am
Here’s the book. I’ve gone through 4 copies in my lifetime, having lent them out and never seen them again. And here’s AstroDienst. Have fun!
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 11:10 am
Cap: I was fortunate to be raised by a Capricorn. It’s the only reason I have any restraint whatsoever. Seriously.
capricorn1966 said,
June 20, 2007 at 11:13 am
i know i can approximate. but it seemed like alot of work.
capricorn1966 said,
June 20, 2007 at 11:20 am
but don’t you need the exact time find your rising sun. my missing link is my rising sun. I don’t even know time of the day i was born. nobody seems to know.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 11:20 am
I like to entertain. It’s like a facial tic I have. As long as someone’s laughing, I’ll keep going. And I’m quite shallow, so this seems to work out. It’s probably pretty annoying on a blog. I blame Spanky. If I split myself between two threads, it’s less annoying (I hope). But I could be delusional. It’s been suggested.
capricorn1966 said,
June 20, 2007 at 11:20 am
capricorns are good people. I’m not just saying that.
capricorn1966 said,
June 20, 2007 at 11:24 am
now I think we are boring everyone now.
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 11:25 am
i am a aries. as if there was any question
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 11:27 am
i think heather and i feed off of each other.
we are both too cunsumed in our own satisfaction with bababling to each other we rarely stop to think if we are anoying, and when we do, i dont think we care.
capricorn1966 said,
June 20, 2007 at 11:34 am
Sorry Spank, due to my attention deficit, I can’t remember everything, so I don’t know to much on aries. I’ll get back to you tomorrow, as soon as I go home and look through my reference.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 11:39 am
Cap: If you can stand not knowing the rising sign, nothing else is affected all that much without the exact time. Because beyond the 24 hours you already know you’re in the window of, the deviations of the rising sign don’t make that much difference to the rest of the chart. How nerdly do I sound? I’m like uber-astrology dork.
Anyway, really, blah blah blah, more about me! I normally try to confine myself to the workaday hours, though last night, the Dragon Story made me laugh into the night. I cannot be held responsible for this.
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 11:41 am
aries = fightcat. among other things
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 11:43 am
“Thundercats: HO!”
julieluongo said,
June 20, 2007 at 11:49 am
First off, let me say that I’ll admit that it’s entirely possible that celestial bodies could somehow exert influence on personality and could affect people similarly across time. Stranger things have happened, I guess.
However, what seems more likely is that the astrological personality definitions are sufficiently vague that anyone could identify with them. Like the Leo thing you mentioned, Cappy – Leo’s like to be the center of attention. Well, I’d ask, who doesn’t like attention? And who doesn’t also dislike attention? Right? You can probably think of examples where you both like and dislike being the center of attention.
Astrology seems to lead us to align ourselves with certain traits that everyone shares. I think one of mine is that I like to speak my mind. Who doesn’t? Both my sister and my dad are Aries and they are pretty different people in fundamental ways and neither of them are fightcats.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 11:52 am
MBTI Kraken. Bwraaaa! Let it rip!
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 11:56 am
I don’t put much stock in astrology actually. It’s one of those things I ended up knowing about for no real reason, and so when given the opportunity to expound, I take it. That’s mostly just because I’m an ass, I think, though, rather than a Leo.
Christy said,
June 20, 2007 at 11:58 am
Astrology is gay.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:02 pm
In fact, the Sun signs and birth positions were one of the least interesting parts of astrology when I dug into it. Then, you know, I got boreded and moved on. Hard to believe.
And I was waiting for Christy to chime in for about half an hour. I kept thinking, “I’ll bet this whole conversation is chapping her ass right now.” More Sanchez pics!
julieluongo said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:02 pm
Naturally, I think if you’re interested in understanding personality, you should go with an academic framework that has been subjected to the scientific method; is based on answers to carefully crafted questions and observation; is respected by psychologists, sociologists, and scholars; and is used by all sorts of businesses, and govenment agencies, and now professional sports recruiters to determine aptitude.
Love,
The MBTI Kraken
michael said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:02 pm
I’d fuck it.
julieluongo said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:03 pm
The MBTI Kraken?
michael said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:05 pm
Astrology. Christy said it was gay, and then I said I’d fuck it.
The serial commenting got in the way, is all. Damn serial commenting.
julieluongo said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:06 pm
The MBTI Kraken is gay too.
Christy said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:08 pm
I’m already loading up photoshop Michael….
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:09 pm
Julie: Yes.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:11 pm
Nice editing, people. You do excellent work.
julieluongo said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:15 pm
But now that took out the part where Michael said something to Christy about Photoshop, which she responded to…and now we’re talking about it, which is confusing since the comments are gone. Censorship is a slippery slope I wish I’d never stepped on.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:17 pm
I missed the PhotoShop antecedent anyway, so it looks exactly as out of nowhere as it did the first time I read it. But please keep in mind, I’m extra-super-fruity.
capricorn1966 said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:25 pm
Well Julie, the thing is, that sounds like to much book work for me. I have one astrology book and sometimes I watch the discovery channel on astrology. I think it’s fun and interesting and I’m not looking to be scholar.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:29 pm
OK. Now just for the hell of it, I’m going to refer to something that was there, but is no longer: I’m pretty sure everyone realizes that Michael doesn’t fuck hens.
Random. Awesome.
julieluongo said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:30 pm
It’s not a lot of work. You don’t even need one book. This website is fun:
http://www.personalitypage.com/
And this test is the best:
http://similarminds.com/jung.html
Just for fun, take the test and read your type. If you like it, test your friends and read up on their types.
It can get very complex if you’re a scholar, but the surface study is satisfying and fun. Also, if you do get into it, it’s no more complicated than the moon ascending and the sun rising and the conditions today plus the conditions at the exact time of birth, etc.
Gary said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:33 pm
astrology = work of satan. Real Christians know this.
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:36 pm
I allign my life and personality based on the characters on the show Xena. and if anyone says i am wrong, i will cut them.
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:37 pm
gary are you a real christian or a store bought one?
Gary said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:38 pm
is that a real poncho or a Sears poncho? hmmm no foolin
Christy said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:39 pm
Everytime I take those tests Julie – every fucking time. I’ve been trying to cock it up – to no avail. My personality results say “I’m a dick.”
Christy said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:40 pm
I love that one of the featured careers of my personality type is dictator.
risk taker, easy going, outgoing, social, open, rule breaker, thrill seeker, life of the party, comfortable in unfamiliar situations, appreciates strangeness, disorganized, adventurous, talented at presentation, aggressive, attention seeking, experience junky, insensitive, adaptable, not easily offended, messy, carefree, dangerous, fearless, careless, emotionally stable, spontaneous, improviser, always joking, player, wild and crazy, dominant, acts without thinking, not into organized religion, pro-weed legalization
favored careers:
dictator, computer consultant, international spy, tv producer, philosopher, comedian, music performer, it consultant, figher pilot, politician, diplomat, entertainer, game designer, bar owner, freelance writer, creative director, strategist, news anchor, professional skateboarder, airline pilot, comic book artist, college professor, private detective, mechanical engineer, lecturer, ambassador, astronomer, research scientist, judge, web developer, scholar, fbi agent, cia agent, electrical engineer, assassin
disfavored careers:
personal assistant, wedding planner, travel agent, secretary, interior decorator, clerical employee, government employee, social worker, pre school teacher, copy editor, child care worker, hospitality worker, occupational therapist, home maker
capricorn1966 said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:41 pm
thanks Julie, I added that to my favorites. It sounds interesting.
Astrology is not pyschic or fortune telling. It’s about personalities. People think when they read their horoscope for the week that it’s telling them their future. So I don’t see where it conflicts with Christianity.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:41 pm
Yes. For just 40 pieces of silver, or 4 easy payments of just 10 pieces a month, this lovely Christian can be yours.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:41 pm
I knew they’d sell them in stores eventually.
Christy said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:42 pm
I can see how IT consultant, international spy and dictator all kind of lend themselves to a particular similar personality type.
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:43 pm
JULIE i took the second test listed and it says I am a ESFJ and based on that ill have to say that my Xena life plotting is dead on
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:43 pm
Disfavored careers: home maker. Ha ha ha ha ha.
Christy said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:45 pm
For ESFJ – I love how it discusses general personality traits – and then makes the leap that you don’t like science fiction:
does not like being alone, thinks life has purpose/meaning, organized, values organized religion, outgoing, social, does not like strange people/things – likely intolerant of differences, open, easy to read, dislikes science fiction, values relationships and families over intellectual pursuits, group oriented, follows the rules, affectionate, planner, regular, orderly, clean, finisher, religious, consults others before acting, content, positive, loves getting massages, complimentary, dutiful, loving, considerate, altruistic
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:47 pm
I got kinda pissed/bored/unsure half way thru the test and gave up.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:48 pm
No, no. It’s Virgos who don’t like science fiction. Um. DUH.
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:49 pm
meaning that i kinda just filled the middle dot alot because, i do like too make precise plans, but my room and my care are a complete mess which is a personality conflict. i just had a hard time gettin what i thought was an objective answer. I had to ask my friend if i was wierd and her relpy? “no wierder than i am”
Gary said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:49 pm
http://typelogic.com/esfj.html
Christy said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:51 pm
ESFJ
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:51 pm
Guardians of birthdays, holidays and celebrations, ESFJs are generous entertainers. They enjoy and joyfully observe traditions and are liberal in giving, especially where custom prescribes.
OHHH i do like to entertain….
Gary said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:51 pm
http://typelogic.com/entp.html
Christy said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:51 pm
ENTP
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:53 pm
I resent that I am like nancy kerrigan or Monica from friends. I dont have awesome big hair, or the ability to skate.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:54 pm
“OHHH i do like to entertain….”
Congratulations! You’re a Leo!
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:54 pm
I thinkthe entp is a better deal. sounds better. meanwhile i am sally struthers.
Gary said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:55 pm
ENTPs have little patience with those they consider wrongheaded or unintelligent, and show little restraint in demonstrating this.
OMG! It’s sorcery!!
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:55 pm
How totally wacko is it that Gary and Christy are posting exactly the same thing at exactly the same time?
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:56 pm
Did anyone notice that just now?
Gary said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:56 pm
Sally, give that staving kid a bite of your sandwich…
Gary said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:58 pm
I thought she was just doing it because I wasn’t making it a nice link…. either that or it MAGIC SPACIALPOWERZSLOLERZ
Christy said,
June 20, 2007 at 12:59 pm
No, I actually hadn’t refreshed the page so I didn’t see your posts until after I posted the redundancy..
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:00 pm
Twice that happened. It was cool.
michael said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:00 pm
INTJs rule the house. We hate everybody, because we’re better than they are.
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:01 pm
so you guys are twins eh? Sorry christy but id re take that fucking test now or next thing ya know gary will have you selling christians door to door
michael said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:01 pm
It’s that serial posting thing again. It’s a wacky day for that.
Gary said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:01 pm
You said it Sanchez
julieluongo said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:01 pm
Christy and Gary, your dual comments are creeping me out. Christy, are you messing with Gary or was that a two time coincidence?
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:01 pm
and SALLY doesnt share her sandwich with ANYONE!! dont you watch southpark??
julieluongo said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:02 pm
Oh, duh, I didn’t refresh just now.
Gary said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:02 pm
No I’m twins with Mike Sanchez, not Christy
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:04 pm
There is some serious planetary alignment happening hyuh. Everyone DUCK FOR COVER!!!
julieluongo said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:04 pm
Michael and Gary are INTJ, which is pretty rare. And we got two of them here folks. That’s right!
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:04 pm
comments are flying everywhere. put a helmut on
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:05 pm
It’s balls-out commenting. No pantywaists allowed!
Door-to-door Christian salesmen. Hoo hoo hoo. That’d be a new knock to wake up to on Sunday. “Has anyone told you that you could own one of these? No? Let me come in and read this book with you…”
michael said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:06 pm
Better-than-everybody-twins, unite. Although the sanchez thing…. I think I’m just not talented at teasing/threatening other people. Somehow it always seems to backfire on me. Curse you Christy, and your damn phony dragon story.
I suppose I could tell a certain story involving Christy’s horrendous diarrhea this one time, but that would just be cruel.
Gary said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:08 pm
It’s funny because it’s true! I AM better than everyone.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:09 pm
Dear God, no. Please don’t unite.
julieluongo said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:09 pm
More fun facts about INTJs:
* If you encounter an INTJ, there is a 37% probability that his IQ places him in the top 2 percent of the population.
michael said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:11 pm
SWEET! That is totally me. A 2 per center. alot.
julieluongo said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:12 pm
And…:
* The INTJ with well-developed judgment will be able to grasp and process concepts that are beyond what their natural intelligence appears to be able to handle.
Gary said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:14 pm
That’s right! I AM smarter than I look!
Gary said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:15 pm
I feel like Julie is hitting on me…
julieluongo said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:16 pm
What good is all of this brain power if you can’t use it though, you say…but look:
* When given a goal or context, an INTJ is able to generate all kinds of possibilities. They’re able to see the problem from many different angles, and come up with a solution that fits the needs of the current situation.
* Their deep understanding, logical abilities, and persistence may enable them to make discoveries or uncover new ways of looking at something. In such a way, they may perform a great service to society. For example, an INTJ is the likely personality type to discover the cure for cancer.
So, chop chop.
Gary said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:16 pm
Meyers-Briggs = satan
Gary said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:17 pm
yeah that’s where it all falls apart for me… I serve no purpose whatsoever for society… oh well that was fun while it lasted.
julieluongo said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:17 pm
How can this type do wrong, you ask. Gary and Michael don’t seem that great. Hmmm:
* May be intolerant of weaknesses in others
* May believe that they’re always right
* May be cuttingly derisive and sarcastic towards others
* May have an intense and quick temper
* May hold grudges, and have difficulty forgiving people
* May be wishy-washy and unsure how to act in situations that require quick decision making
* May have difficulty communicating their thoughts and feelings to others
* May see so many tangents everywhere that they can’t stay focused on the bottom line or the big picture
Work on that.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:18 pm
Julie doesn’t hit on people.
Gary said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:18 pm
I’m hard-wired.
julieluongo said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:19 pm
What else might trip up the INTJ? Let’s see:
* May be unaware (and sometimes uncaring) of how they come across to others
* May quickly dismiss input from others without really considering it
* May apply their judgment more often towards others, rather than towards themselves
* With their ability to see an issue from many sides, they may always find others at fault for problems in their own lives
* May look at external ideas and people with the primary purpose of finding fault
* May take pride in their ability to be critical and find fault in people and things
* May have unrealistic and/or unreasonable expectations of others
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:20 pm
Why does half of that list there seem to apply to me? Because I’m self-aggrandizing? From all my awesomeness and whatnot?
Gary said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:21 pm
Julie, I fail to see the bad part….
Gary said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:23 pm
I love how Julie builds us up and then cuts us down. What kind of personality is that?!? HUH?!? HUH!!?
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:23 pm
i have a headache. im out for the day, i am having panic attacks over a personal matter.
julieluongo said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:27 pm
Spanky, take some ibuprophen. And please present a doctor’s note tomorrow to the Blog Police.
julieluongo said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:30 pm
And the best of my type (ENFP) is Eleanor Roosevelt and the worst of my type is Hitler (there is some argument over his type, but my MBTI-dork friends and I have settled on ENFP for him).
julieluongo said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:32 pm
Gary, I can tell you your weaknesses becasue you rarely take criticism personally. But that’s because you don’t think much of most people, so when you’re criticized by peons, who cares…right?
michael said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:35 pm
From what I can see, there is nothing bad on Julie’s so-called INTJ fault lists. Those are all issues of perfectionism.
Don’t let her get you down, Gary. We’re better than all of ‘em. Here’s my plan; Gary and I will discover the cure for cancer, and then prove it on live TV, and then withhold it from the public for 10 or 20 years until we can get the best payoff on our patent. In the meantime we’ll have hired assassins give everybody on the religious right cancer, and when we make the cure available, we won’t give to them at any price.
The we’ll take over the world. What do you say, Gary, are you in?
michael said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:37 pm
It’s kind of a messy plan though, I know. I’ll work on it.
julieluongo said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:38 pm
Hmm, Michael are you finding fault with the religious right for problems in your own life?
michael said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:39 pm
Hmm. No.
Sissy said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:41 pm
Whoa. What’s going on here? Julie, are you stealing comments? I feel like I’m reading every third comment in a conversation. Don’t take out hen fucking. You act like you don’t fuck a nice plump hen every now and again. Who doesn’t?
Christy, You thought that was crusted gravy in those boats? Think again.
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:43 pm
crusted gravy
Gary said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:45 pm
“Gary, I can tell you your weaknesses becasue you rarely take criticism personally. But that’s because you don’t think much of most people, so when you’re criticized by peons, who cares…right?”
Holly crap Julie hates me. I guess I should leave. I’ve got plans to work on anyway with Michael.
Christy said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:45 pm
If it wasn’t crusted gravy – Michael has discolored emissions.
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:49 pm
i love how michael plans to give the christians cancer…did i read that right?/ yeah that will gain you alot of followers…folks love the slaying of religious folk….big fans
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:49 pm
He’s just like a big Bit O’ Evil.
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:53 pm
what is that villian on spongebob>??? big ball of dirt hahahahah thats mike….big ball of cancer wha hahahahahahah
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:54 pm
My theory is that Michael is like some kind of Wonka thing that’s sweet deep down. Like super, super, way, way, way down? Totally sweet. It’s just he’s got a shiny hard candy shell of evil.
Christy said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:55 pm
Michael, if you’re planning on infecting religious extremists with disease wouldn’t the HIV be more fitting? I have just your product.
julieluongo said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:55 pm
Wait a sec…Gary, are you flirting with me?
Christy said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:56 pm
Not to be gay or anything – but how is Michael’s sweetness hidden deep down? He’s pretty fucking nice – when he tries to be mean it never works out anyway..
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 1:57 pm
I was dodging and weaving. I wouldn’t actually know.
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:00 pm
I stand corrected…I looked up the spongebob character…its name is “the dirty bubble” hahahahahaah
Gary said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:01 pm
blah blah blah don’t any of you people have anything interesting to say?
michael said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:01 pm
No no! I’m evil! EVIL.
julieluongo said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:01 pm
Spanky, are you feeling better?
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:02 pm
mike may be all sweet dragon breath to you chsirty…but he is nothing but dirty bubble to me. soory.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:02 pm
Hm. Let’s see. Oooh! I know! No. Uh…
julieluongo said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:02 pm
Gary:
* May have unrealistic and/or unreasonable expectations of others
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:04 pm
Julie: no I am not ok, but I must move onward. I cannot let these opressive daycare people get me down. I am just going to get myself a dirty bubble and sick it on them.
I aquired some advil for my other ailments. and i found some stale m&m’s so that helped too. i am a wounded but not yet dead. must i still supply a signed excuse from my mother fucker…i mean my mother?
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:05 pm
No. I lied. Mike is pure and total evil.
Gary said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:07 pm
“Gary:
* May have unrealistic and/or unreasonable expectations of others”
I’m having trouble reconciling that and the fact that I know everyone sucks.
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:07 pm
I do not know mike or gary well enough to state that they are either mean or evil. i will say that in my experience with them, i have NOT found them to be VERY nice. having said that, i will also make the statement that I am not very nice either. i am only sometimes nice.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:08 pm
I am never not sometimes nice.
Is everyone happy yet? Yay!
michael said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:08 pm
That’s it, spank. No Cancer cure for you.
Christy, I totally want to market HIV in a can. You can join the evil plan. You’ll be Executive Manager in charge of Abortions, Infections, and the overall Human Population Control Office.
Gary said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:09 pm
hey – how’s the name Lima Bean Drechsel sound for a girl?
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:09 pm
Hee hee.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:09 pm
Wait. Is Stacy pregnant?
julieluongo said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:10 pm
Are you having a baby, Gary?
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:10 pm
name her after mike….dirty bubble
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:11 pm
i smell a fireroasted babay!!!!!
julieluongo said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:11 pm
Becasue I always lobby for the same name:
Julie
It’s a good name. I’ve been very happy with it.
Gary said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:12 pm
Dirty Bubble Drechsel would definitely wind up on heroin.
michael said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:12 pm
Lima Beans cause really bad gas.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:12 pm
OMG. You just told Gary to name his baby after you. Ha ha ha ha.
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:13 pm
Dirty Bubble Drechsel would definitely wind up on heroin.
Oh gary i dont even care if yer mean, that was fucking funny….
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:15 pm
julie i just sent you some stellar pics. very funny kitty pics too.
Gary said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:15 pm
who’s blog are you posting on 50 times a day?
IDK MY BFF Julie?
Christy said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:16 pm
If you guys consider Mike evil – your threshold is pretty darn low. I think this little group is doomed in terms of the concoction of villainous plans.
michael said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:17 pm
Dammit Christy, I’m evil! I’m evil I’m evil I’m evil I’m evil!
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:19 pm
I dont think he is evil. at best he is “snide”
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:19 pm
He wants to be thought of as evil, so be it.
But GAD DAMN IT, people, it’s just jokes! Jokie jokie jokie jokes.
You guys… (I’m saying that as Jim saying that as Cartman.)
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:20 pm
You guys… (I’m saying that as Jim saying that as Cartman.)
i had to read that twice.
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:22 pm
i am the evilist girl. cept for christy. who would kill me with her farts/
michael said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:23 pm
I’m bored now. I’m going to go be better than everybody somewhere else. Like, at work, or something, where I’m supposed to be learning stuff.
Christy said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:23 pm
By the way…. I accept the position offered: Executive Manager in charge of Abortions, Infections, and the overall Human Population Control Office. Generally executive positions are cockly – except of course for the excessive salary that they come with – just one change – can the position be known as CAO – Chief Abortion Officer? This can apply to abortions performed prior and post birth.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:25 pm
I’m still waiting to hear Peg’s priest story.
Gary said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:30 pm
Michael has to go somewhere else to be better than everyone because I’m here.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:31 pm
Dur.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:32 pm
Is Stacy pregnant or not, chump?
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:32 pm
Because I was thinking you should name her Heather.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:33 pm
The baby lima bean, that is.
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:33 pm
ha ha ha to all of you. i dont want to work in the department of abortions. too many vaginas. and honestly, i can barely empty the litter box with out throwing up (and i i have puked in the past) so i dont know if i can handle the carnage of abortion. too much blood and fetus for me. and grisle. can i be head of the “DEPARTMENT OF GENERAL DISDAIN” ill carry a stick and promise to be extra mean and unfair.
Pegster said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:34 pm
ISFPs are creative, sensitive souls with a great capacity for love. They seek harmony, validation, and affection in their relationships with others. They value creativity and spirituality. Very sensitive and easily hurt by rejection and harshness, they are sometimes drawn to turn their love towards creatures who will love them back unconditionally, such as animals and small chlidren. They believe heartily in unconditional love, and in an individual’s right to be themself without being judged harshly for who they are. Of all of the types, the ISFP is most likely to believe that “Love is the answer.” For the ISFP, personal success depends upon the condition of their closest relationships, their aesthetic environment and the development of their artistic creativity, their spiritual development, and how much they feel valued and accepted for their individual contributions.
An affair with a priest = spiritual development
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:36 pm
Spank: Hell yes, you can. General Disdain is probably the most important department there is. It’s right up there next to “Propaganda” and “Dancing Boys.”
Peg: Indeed. How long was yours?
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:37 pm
does peg have a wanker?/ what are we measuring here?/
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:37 pm
I meant, how long was the affair?
Gary said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:43 pm
“Is Stacy pregnant or not, chump?”
I’m feeling the love of Jesus in your words.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:47 pm
I’ll bet.
Gary said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:53 pm
Julie Heather Drechsel or Heather Julie Drechsel ?
I don’t think either work…
what’s your middle names? We like middle names.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:55 pm
I don’t have one. Go with Julie’s.
Gary said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:55 pm
Is Julie a full name? Or is it like short for Julieta or something hahahaha
julieluongo said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:56 pm
Julie Alice. Mom’s name.
Gary said,
June 20, 2007 at 2:59 pm
I hate girl names. It better be a boy. If it’s a girl I’m leaving it out on the ice.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 3:02 pm
Yes, but are you two having another baby? Answer the question, Claire. DAMN!
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 3:02 pm
name her garyetta
Gary said,
June 20, 2007 at 3:04 pm
Garyetta Oweena Drechsel — I think that’s a keeper. Keep her home so she doesn’t get her ass kicked.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 3:05 pm
O-Ween-a. Ha ha ha ha.
julieluongo said,
June 20, 2007 at 3:05 pm
Whatever you name it, be sure to check the name with the Kabalarians:
http://www.kabalarians.com/index.cfm
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 3:06 pm
Well, as Will Ferrell would say, “Fuck this. I’m leaving.” But if Stacy does have a new bun in the oven, G, CONGRATULATIONS. Chump.
Gary said,
June 20, 2007 at 3:10 pm
Mildred Eunice Drechsel has a sexy ring to it.
Gary said,
June 20, 2007 at 3:12 pm
Heather if you think that repeatedly calling me chump is making me want to cooperate with you, you haven’t been studying your Miggs-Breyers, babe.
spanky said,
June 20, 2007 at 3:20 pm
chump humper
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 3:22 pm
What do I need you to cooperate with me for? Oooh. Are we moving a couch?
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 3:24 pm
How come no one sends me the note when there is furniture moving?
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 3:25 pm
I SAID, “Fuck this! I’m leaving!” Damn it. Someone pry the mouse out from my cold, dead hands, please. Thanks.
michael said,
June 20, 2007 at 3:27 pm
Stop assigning phony offices for MY evil plan.
Christy, I hereby dub thee Chief Abortion Officer.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 3:30 pm
So solly.
julieluongo said,
June 20, 2007 at 3:31 pm
I’m not happy with the evil plan. It’s not immediately benefitting me in any way. If we’re going to entertain plans, evil or otherwise, shouldn’t they have something fun in them for me?
michael said,
June 20, 2007 at 3:38 pm
You can be our Chief Recruiter. Go use MBTI and find us some evil fucks with a wicked sense of humor that want to help depopulate the human race. More INTJs, because those are the best kind.
The official is Chief MBTI Kraken, of course.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 3:44 pm
Project Manager? I’m going to suggest, from the sidelines, that you lay out the Plan including expenditures and timelines. Your minions need targets and expectations for deliverables. They can’t work blind! Itemize things like “How evil should the fucks be and what is acceptable margin of error?” “How long should it take to depopulate the human race?” and that sort of thing.
michael said,
June 20, 2007 at 3:44 pm
The official title, I mean.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 3:45 pm
Not trying to tell you how to do your job. Of course. That would be wrong.
julieluongo said,
June 20, 2007 at 3:47 pm
Ok, Chief MBTI Kraken. I accept.
michael said,
June 20, 2007 at 3:48 pm
An INTJ needs no guidelines or time lines. Those things are for inferior thinkers. He is superior because he is instinctively aware of what needs to be done, and when. His strength comes from reading the situation at any given moment and performing the necessary adjustments on the fly. A plan outline only hinders creative action.
Gary said,
June 20, 2007 at 3:50 pm
For some reason this whole discussion is making me think of the song “City Hall” by Tenacious D
And then after the smoke is cleared,
and the rubble has been swept away,
me and Michael will peek out our heads.
We’ve been watching the riots on a monitor twenty floors below sea level,
from a bunker.
michael said,
June 20, 2007 at 3:53 pm
Ha, sweet.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 3:58 pm
Good God. It’s like I can see a coconut in each hand.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 4:05 pm
Probably from staring at a screen laughing for so long. Must… go… Good luck with your evil and all that! Don’t forget yer pie charts!
Jim said,
June 20, 2007 at 5:13 pm
As an INTP, I’d just like to say that this evil plan stuff seems like total nonsense, but I don’t have enough information on the subject to formulate an accurate opinion.
Gary, you should name your daughter after where she came from…Howz about Vulva Jean or Uterus May… Dude, if you name your daughter Cunty Elizabeth – I’ll give you like, a whole dollar.
Jim said,
June 20, 2007 at 5:14 pm
Blasphemers!
michael said,
June 20, 2007 at 5:48 pm
Hmmm… yes yes, of course it’s nonsense. Never mind. Look over here, guy.
Gary said,
June 20, 2007 at 6:56 pm
I sometimes get INTP when I take the test.
I was considering Mulva Seven, as a tribute to Seinfeld.
Gary said,
June 20, 2007 at 7:11 pm
Jim that video rules – I knew a lot of it but the astronomical stuff had some things I wasn’t aware of.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WwzDFvqfcdc
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OqP5KdYKFB0
more
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 7:16 pm
Jim, Gary, Michael, you’re smart INT types. I’d like to pose a hypothetical question: If you were a) straight, b) virulently hated religion and I mean, HATED IT, yet c) had somehow married a delightful Jewish girl – and I know it’s a stretch, but assume all three are true for science – would you spend your every waking moment bad-mouthing her religion and every person who believed it? I’m saying IF, THEN. If you did, then would you? I am compiling important data for my pie chart. Thank you.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 7:23 pm
Assume that it doesn’t offend her or her family and that she has no plans to have or raise Jewish children.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 7:26 pm
Actually, anyone can answer; I’m just trying to formulate a theory.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 7:46 pm
I’m asking because I know someone who does this, and it always strikes me as incongruous.
Christy said,
June 20, 2007 at 7:49 pm
I don’t think Michael can pull off straight.
Gary said,
June 20, 2007 at 8:05 pm
How can anyone seriously answer that question unless they already do this? And then you’d already have the answer.
The person you know that does what you say seems like a dick. Why would you marry someone who’s views you strongly dislike or hate? Makes no sense to me. He probably thought he could overlook it since the rest of her was so bitchen, but I guess he couldn’t. Probably should have asked me for advice before getting married
OK I’ll try to look at it as a hypothetical – but I’m not taking you seriously because part of your question is not serious.
No I would not “spend your every waking moment bad-mouthing her religion and every person who believed it” because I’d get bored of doing only that the entire time I’m awake. I’m sure I’d have other hobbies and maybe even a job, but I’d certainly bad mouth the religion and it’s followers at some point. But then again why would I marry this person? I’m having trouble getting past that part.
Back in reality I would say don’t marry a religious person if religion bothers you. I wouldn’t do it (and didn’t), because it would probably cause some friction. A somewhat similar world view is a good thing for a long relationship, in my opinion. Either that or you can’t let it bother you. This seems easier said than done, but I’m sure people do it all the time. I’m sure some people learn who to keep their beliefs to themselves. They must exist somewhere. hehehe.
BTW – I love me some jews. Nearly all of my early crushes were on cute jewish girls.
michael said,
June 20, 2007 at 9:03 pm
The word “hours” does not come from Horus. Hora was a Greek word, and Greek did not evolve from Egyptian. (I’ll be proven wrong on this point, as I’ve never really studied etymology, but I’m fairly sure that Greek evolved separately from Egyptian) Other than a few other similar flaws in logic, I liked that video. I’ve read a lot of Joseph Campbell, and he has quite a bit of similar things to say about the commonness of the God Myth.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 9:12 pm
Mmmmm… coconuts. Word to your moms.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 9:18 pm
Christy is the Queen of the Dirty Sancheese! Ha ha ha.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 9:25 pm
I’m going to see if I can find me an Orthodox Jew to marry. I could pull that off. Mebbe. Oooh! Better: marry a Hasidic one because why? They make the best beards. Hoo hoo hoo.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 9:33 pm
I slay me. Also? I decided Gary’s kid’s name should be Heather Imelda Sanchez-Drechsel. It’s only right.
Heather said,
June 20, 2007 at 9:42 pm
Also, sorry in advance for the serial commenting here. Here’s the thing: I’ve been home sick with a sick kid for the last six days and pretty much completely flipped my shit. But you all made me laugh and I am eternally grateful.
Gary said,
June 20, 2007 at 10:01 pm
Heather – marry one of those orthodox Jews that are against Israel. I dig them.
Jim said,
June 20, 2007 at 10:19 pm
I’m sure both Greek and Egyptian both evolved from something even older – Sumerian or something.
I just like the all the other suns of god with the exact same friggin’ background story. Couldn’t even be bothered to make up a new one.
I also like it because it all brings me one step closer to finding the brown note of blasphemy.
spanky said,
June 21, 2007 at 7:13 am
they have cool hair too
spanky said,
June 21, 2007 at 7:17 am
this evil plan has got me down. maybe that was the desired effect. i have my office of general disdain wether or not dirty bubble makes this a “go”
i dont feel good and so because of that all around me muct suffer as well.
michael said,
June 21, 2007 at 9:10 am
You can have a position too, spank. You can be the Minister of Obfuscation and Disinformation. Public Relations, I mean.
Heather said,
June 21, 2007 at 9:12 am
Back at work and feeling somewhat sane. AWRIGHT. Top o’ the morning to ye!
spanky said,
June 21, 2007 at 9:17 am
Id like to be in the missionary postion as well. i think i can handle both
Gary said,
June 21, 2007 at 9:22 am
http://www.theage.com.au/news/national/stab-victim-continued-masturbating/2007/06/20/1182019174853.html
these kinds of things make me happy – I’m not right
Gary said,
June 21, 2007 at 9:23 am
http://www.cnn.com/2007/LAW/06/07/face.tree.ap/index.html
another Jesus tree…. or is it?
spanky said,
June 21, 2007 at 9:39 am
“Despite his injury, it seems (Mr Blair) continued to masturbate while in the garage,” the prosecutor said.
made me laugh out loud.
spanky said,
June 21, 2007 at 9:40 am
that tree looks like the scream mask to me. very scarity. trees should not have faces
spanky said,
June 21, 2007 at 9:50 am
ck this out
http://www.snopes.com/photos/arts/microscopic.asp
spanky said,
June 21, 2007 at 10:09 am
http://www.snopes.com/photos/odd/lucy.asp
spanky said,
June 21, 2007 at 10:23 am
http://www.snopes.com/photos/arts/family.asp
spanky said,
June 21, 2007 at 10:32 am
http://www.snopes.com/photos/medical/nepalbaby.asp
Heather said,
June 21, 2007 at 10:38 am
I’m sorry. Everyone at Ye Office seems to agree this is the best story of the day: Pair Told Not To Name Son ‘4real’
Heather said,
June 21, 2007 at 10:41 am
THINK: If they’d only gone with “Julie” or “Heather,” this whole thing could have been avoided.
spanky said,
June 21, 2007 at 10:49 am
maybe they should try foureal instead of 4real
Heather said,
June 21, 2007 at 10:50 am
I will give $5 to anyone who can tell me which Office I’d like to occupy in The Evil Plan. Guess.
Heather said,
June 21, 2007 at 10:51 am
I’m naming my next child Foreskin Jones.
spanky said,
June 21, 2007 at 11:04 am
the office of international muff eating?
Foreskin Jones.
bahhahahahahahah
Heather said,
June 21, 2007 at 11:08 am
Nope.
spanky said,
June 21, 2007 at 11:13 am
its really quiet here today. its making me nervous
Heather said,
June 21, 2007 at 11:17 am
I seem to have discovered a pattern, but I cannot share it with you at this time, but I wrote it all over my walls like Russell Crowe in A Beautiful Mind. It has to do with degrees of separation. Also, sextaints.
spanky said,
June 21, 2007 at 11:27 am
i am confused and uncomfortable. does this have anything to do with the size of my taint?
Heather said,
June 21, 2007 at 11:33 am
No. I was just trying to lure people out of the woodwork to correct me. Alas! They are night owls.
Heather said,
June 21, 2007 at 11:35 am
Either that, or they’re waiting for me to shut the eff up so they can chime in. CHIME!
spanky said,
June 21, 2007 at 11:42 am
shoot.
Gary said,
June 21, 2007 at 12:11 pm
It’s a beautiful day and I was at the park and outside in my yard.
I think if you want to call your kid 4Real they shouldn’t be allowed to stop you.
“Clarke said the rules are designed to prevent names that are “likely to cause offense to a reasonable person.” Satan and Adolf Hitler were proposed names that have been declined, he said.”
that’s just stupid
Heather said,
June 21, 2007 at 3:47 pm
Oh, alright. I want my position to be the Minister of Silly Walks. If you didn’t know that already, I probably don’t know you.
Miranda said,
October 31, 2007 at 4:08 pm
OMG. Look what I found! A Meet and Greet with Richard Branson and Elvis Costello”.How cool is this, I never thought I would ever have a chance like this. If you want a chance to bid on this visit this link. http://www.ebay.com/virginunite. There is this item up for grabs and many others. I think the auction page says that new items go up ever week too.